Honoring Grief After Thanksgiving

by Aine Cailleach

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During this season of Thanksgiving.  There is a grief that comes in remembering the celebration of family that my mother prepared. There has been an empty place at the table for the past two years and we miss her presence even though she could be irritating and annoying at family events. She liked to be the center of attention. When I first started Womb Awakening, I would see the face of a Crone with an open mouth with words on the tip of her tongue. It was the Voice of the Mother, the voice of all my ancestors.

When my mother was dying, I sat with her watching her breathe with her mouth open that was all that was left of her.  She was the crone I saw at the beginning of womb awakening. For these 6 days, my mother was unable to speak. My mother chattered her entire life, she was intrusive, demanding and was never quiet. And I had never experienced her quietness. The day she entered into this silent state, I knew she was in her final stages of life. I rested my hands on her womb, heart and forehead cradling her back to the Great Womb.  She had many secrets and silent shame she never shared with anyone. I carried her unspeakable shame and guilt of slavery and sexual abuse etched into the epi-genetic imprinting of our wombs in our maternal lineage.  My mother went to her grave carrying this secret shame.

I have spoken the words of all that was forbidden, the shame and the passion, she wouldn't allow herself to feel restoring the original innocence of our Womb Heart. I grieve for all our ancestors who have been overshadowed and overpowered by shame and guilt, carrying these secrets to their graves. She is finally held by the loving arms of The Mother in the dark silence. She rests now, her womb buried in the earth like the placenta reconnecting to the Womb of Gaia. I place a wreath of red roses on her grave to honor the womb heart of the Feminine that births and dissolves all.